Selfish Ask for Help in Situation
I don't have many friends in the industry. Seeking out opinions from those here - I'm happy to answer any questions on my time in banking or UMM PE too.
I enjoy my job, and I'm very good at it, to be blunt. Im a VP2, early promote (only promote in class without business school), and on partner track (happy to give any advice to those that want it).
I am so perpetually tired and burned out. Over the last 6 months, I can tell I give less of a shit, and from my view, it's apparent in my performance. Somehow, this has gone lost on others, and my stock at the firm is in good standing. I perpetually feel guilty that I'm throwing away a dream position, but I can't will my mind to move forward, each day is a struggle. I've only seen mad men once long ago, but I dream every day of just walking away into a cloud.
my ask is: I don't need solutions to burnout (I've read great answers on the forum) - my issue is I don't have enough energy to even deal with my burnout. I just don't care enough to move. I've been grinding for god knows how long. How do I event get myself to fix this - is there a way back to who I was?
I'm not in a relationship and my family is in another country. I dated a girl for 6 years before she called it off, and I'm burnt out from relationships too.
I work out, I bike, I eat healthy, and I have friends. I just don't feel like I have a soul, and all I desperately want us to go find it. My happiest moments are in interactions with completely new people. Im so sorry for this complaint-filled post, I just needed to put this on paper. Feel free to ask questions on PE/IB advice, and I'll happily answer.